Day: June 12, 2009

PAX CULTURA — Ban Ki-Moon — genogram — the father wound — the mother wound — WWII — attempt at understanding through the arts…

I did a lot of research yesterday into the woundings of WWII.  So I want to tell you a little story of mine about the time the agency I worked for sent me out to do groups.  I think it might be appropriate in terms of two things — one is the Wright resurfacing and statement in the last week that I saw covered in the web, and on television, and the second is the NK situation.  We shall see if it fits together through the father and mother wound.

Just as the genogram applies to three generations of the father — it applies to the mother too.  When we are making a genogram we look at both sides.  What I am going to be talking about is how wounds are held and passed in families as belief systems.  A family system carries the wound of its tribe.  Or its father or mother.

So, I’m going to be talking a little about racism –but, I don’t want you to think of that as an American thing only, because, cultures around the world do care for their races?  Race is the history of a people.

The agency got me a grant to work with the senior population near the end of my 3,000 hours.   My job was to go out and create groups.  I went out and made assessments in home and then, part of the object of this grant was to make groups where people could socialize and make friends.  This was daunting task.  I cannot tell you how many different people I saw.  Hundreds.  The stories I heard?

They are all inside my heart.

I cannot know what racism must have been like in the 1940’s in America.  I wasn’t born then.  But I had a client who filled me in.  I’ll never forget the day I went to her house.  She was entirely gracious to me.  Her living room was stuffed full of pictures of Martin Luther King and silhouettes of her children and African art.  I had grown up with those statues myself.  My mother loved African art — just as my uncle loved Oriental art.  I was just always around stuff like that in my life.

At any rate, this client was about 79 at the time.

She had a huge, huge, huge, extended family — whose portraits were also all over her house.  She was so proud of them, each one.  She used to tell me stories about them while she crocheted little caps for people in need.  She would buy all this yarn in bulk and it was a Christmas project.  We used to laugh about her many marriages.  (As women).

Well, she had stories to tell from the 40’s.

She had moved here from Texas as a child and she told me how she got her first job.  Like my mother, this generation of women in America had little help from men.  She had worked her entire life in the food industry — in a school cafeteria.  She was in charge of the whole thing, but to get to the top like that had not been easy.  My sense is that the climate of the ’60’s and ’70’s in California had permitted that?  My mother was an executive as well.  I see this generation of mothers as that.


They didn’t get the opportunity to go to school, or, they did not want to.

After about 15 visits in her home, and because she was so socially isolated,  my clinical supervisor wanted me to put her in a group.  But?  Little did I know that this would be no easy task.

She asked me who was in the group and I began to describe them.

“No, ” she said.  “I’m not going through anything like that again.”

Well, the agency kept on pressuring me to make groups.  What was I going to do?

I had to make a group that had only one white woman.  Myself.

As therapist.

So, as we think about the wounds the world carries across nations, and as we think about doing reframes we want to think about various countries and their nationalism and history.  Why I think there is a chance for peace is because the wounds from WWII are a shadow my generation carries.

PEACE was our generation.  PEACE was what we grew up believing in.

We really did.  The shadow of my generation has to do with MLK and JFK.  Two men who were trying to create that.

It may well be that only the people of my generation will be able to try and accomplish that?

We would be the generation that believed it was possible?

You see, if we use the genogram to trace three generations along matrilinial and patrilinial lines we can use that in any culture on the face of the planet.  Someone who is 60 will have a very different genogram than someone who is 12 years of age at this time.

During the ’70’s it was all the rage to wear coats and jewelry from Afghanistan in California.  My mother got me the most fabulous coat.  It had fur inside and was embroidered all down the front.  I had it for years.  I wonder if anyone still makes those there?  Or if that has been lost.

As I think about my own mother, who is gone now, I know that I grew up in a time of relative peace.  Anyone in my generation has.  So, I want to talk a bit about the mother wound.  This wound is going to look very different all around the world since 1900.  This is why, if we use WWII as a backdrop for “father” — and WWI as a backdrop for grandfather — the generation we as adults are living in would be the “son.”


So, in order to understand Wright as a “son,” you have to go back two generations. It works like this for everyone.  Just go back two generations on both sides.  What was the wound to his grandparents?

If we want to investigate the emotion of rage or fear in 2009, let us look to WWII.

I wanted to look into the mother wound in terms of Korea and I saw it in the wiki.  There is an immense wound to the feminine in this culture dating from 1939.  When we look into the wound, we can begin to understand what emotions have been carried forth into today.

Ban Ki-moon knows this wound, and so, he is the only one in a position to dialogue about that.

If we reframe why a culture would would be nationalistic we need to look at root causes:

“During the Japanese Colonial rule, the Korean language was suppressed in an effort to eradicate Korean national identity. Koreans were forced to take Japanese surnames, known as Sōshi-kaimei.[23] Traditional Korean culture suffered heavy losses, as numerous Korean cultural artifacts were destroyed[24] or taken to Japan.[25] To this day, valuable Korean artifacts can often be found in Japanese museums or among private collections.[26] One investigation by the South Korean government identified 75,311 cultural assets that were taken from Korea, 34,369 of which are in Japan, and 17,803 of which are in the United States. However, experts estimate that over 100,000 artifacts remains in Japan.[25][27] Japanese officials considered returning Korean cultural properties, but to this date [25] have not returned these artifacts to Korea.[27]Liancourt Rocks, a small island located east of the Korean peninsula [28]

If you read the entire history of this ancient, ancient culture — we can understand the role of the “son.”

In 2009.

Was it the life he would have chosen on his own if not for the wounds to his culture?  His parents?

Perhaps not.  I had no idea he was such a prolific thinker and writer.  I found the link.  He is an artist?

If he had not been carrying the wounds of his father?

As we were discussing yesterday, and, as you can view at this link where there are some propaganda posters that are very fierce, we can see “through” the image of the pain that has been carried in this culture through the wound to nationalism and the feminine since WWII.

The anima mundi is the feminine, across the world.

In this part of the world the North has been the preserver of the old culture?  And carries the greater wound.

I read more history here in an Article on Foreign policy…it is about how one starts out as a child in school?

How differently our lives turn out than we expected.

Based upon the genogram and its wounds.