In which major writers of the pumasphere become astounded at the recent turn of events!
July 2, 2008
First, we try and figure out just what is going on with the patriarchal mind, vis a vis, right now!
then, we puzzle! thrice! at what our friends think!
Comment of the day (with additional remarks by Violet)
I’ve felt for the past few months that our nation must be going through one of those mass-insanity, mob-rule periods like the Salem witch trials or the Prohibition era or the McCarthy pinko scare. I imagine that history will not look kindly on this time. Future schoolchildren will wonder what possessed us all and what side would they have been on in the witchhunt of 2008.
I could have written that myself. In fact, a few years from now if I come across that paragraph in some data dumpster dive, I’ll probably think I did write it. It’s exactly how I feel…”
Tuesday: A History Lesson on the Battle of Hastings
“…Today, I would like to talk about warfare. (Now you must imagine RD dressed like some tweedy professor with a bald spot and a bow tie, patches a the elbows of my jacket, standing before you with an overhead projector and some colorful acetates.)
I would like to take you back to the year 1066AD. We are in Anglo-Saxon England and we are in the midst of one of those turmoils where the exact heir to the English throne is somewhat in question. It gets even more complicated when Henry II marries Eleanor of Aquitaine but that’s at least another century from now. In 1066, the match was between Harold and William of Normandy…”
Obama Be With You
“…In case you haven’t heard, Comrade Obama has added up the Democrats who would rather vote for a cockroach — so he is now on a hunt for votes in unlikely quarters. In keeping with his shameless vote whoring habits, he is now pandering to Evangelicals.
Not only is he attempting to con Evangelicals, but he has made The Big Step. Yes, that’s right. Barack Obama says he is going to continue George Bush’s Faith Based programs. I have no doubt that he means it. He plans to provide money to anybody who worships the Highest Of High Lords: Himself. Most of it will go to Reverend Wright though. That new mansion is already too small for his big head. He wants to rebuild. What’s left of the grant will go to his Faith-Based Goddamn AmeriKKKa program. Here, I envision Reverend Wright being in full charge of the Goddamned Faith Based Initiative. I envision this much in the same way as I envision a pardoned Tony Rezko taking charge of HUD and Bill Ayers as Director of Education…”
And we begin to realize, just how baffling, bamboozling and bogus this whole deal is!
We start realizing it is all about about some kind of strange religious codes like these
Where the patriarchy would like to feel all groovy about its speedosomething or other! (hasn’t it always been like that?) except, well…
Right now, your womenfolk ala pumafabsters are feeling frustrated, frayed, full of wicked laughter and VERY disappointed that you pulled off an opposumus with Winnie the Pooh overtones and faux-seals, and now you have even caused more problems where there were NONE! (except in your effed up neck o’ the pork barrel and kickback and slumfest woods)
And we had Hillary Clinton! And you are making a bigger ass out of yourself as each day’s events unfold!
You forced my hand. You killed my notion of what being a Democrat was!
You, made me go Republican o’possumus…
And, what you must realize is that nobody is going to take you seriously, anymore.
You cannot abandon your Preacher and then turn around and try and reform the country’s religious views to fit your model! Besides, haven’t we had ENOUGH from the freakish congregations that have NOTHING to do with mainstream America?
The thing is out o’control.
All because the patriarchy would like to be able to get laid! (like in that song I just played you above!)
Could we just, just, please HAVE A PRESIDENT!
PLEASE!
And by the way, after the rude and sexist way you felt was your balls-driven right to hurt our candidate Hillary Clinton? I wouldn’t expect much help from anyone right now, on that score. Especially her husband.
Or the pumasphere…
You see, I believe this experience is probably going to be one of the biggest karmic lessons you can image, speedster!
All I can say is Yikes! Those roosters and chickens are… well?
About to really roost!
